Warm December

I hate this sight.

I hate seeing all these stupid lovebirds strolling around this shopping mall. Air is cold, Christmas decorations are all over. Funny how places decorated for Christmas always look brighter and sparkling. Don’t get me wrong, I do like the sense of tranquility Christmas emits but I hate seeing all the happy families and couples. Yes, I admit I am such a killjoy.

Earlier today, our lecturer decided to leave early and now here I am…Bored as ever among all these people. It is getting cold but I don’t feel like going home. Why should I go home? Home doesn’t even feel like… home. My so-called “home” is a small apartment room with nobody inside. I left home last year because I couldn’t stand my parents arguing every day. When I told them to just separate, they used me as an excuse to carry on.

Do me a favor and answer: How is forcing to be together good for your child? Unhappy household is the most lethal toxic for children, at least I believe so. For years, I’ve watched them arguing and living without any happiness. I was never happy at all. I don’t even feel like being with my classmates who are busy gossiping about how their parents bought them latest smartphone. Those kinds of stories are sickening, okay? I stare at my wristwatch-In thirty minutes, I’d have to head to my part time workplace. Just a simple donut shop.

I quicken my walking pace and head to the shop.

***

The donut shop “DONUT CASTLE” is crowded as ever, selling tons of special Christmas edition donuts. There are red velvet donuts, berry and mint donuts, gingerbread donuts, Santa-shaped donuts and a box full of cute mini Christmas donuts. My colleague, Mary, is beside me humming a song. Incidentally, she is also the only friend I have.

“You sound chirpy, Mary. Something good happened?”

“Nah, just that my usual joint is having a sale on cosmetics”

“Hmmm…I see”

Mary is the kind of girl who is very updated when it comes to fashion, make up and trends. She’s a blonde 167 cm tall girl who’s very fashionable and pretty. Guests of this shop will always glance at her with pinkish cheeks. I asked her before why she didn’t try being a model but she said that she doesn’t like being recognized by a huge mass of people.

“You know”, Mary spoke, ”I’ve always said this to you but why don’t you try?”

“Try?”

“You know, fashion trends, make up… You’re actually cute you know”

“I just…don’t like that kind of thing”

“It’s kind of a waste. Just give me two hours and I can make you look TOTALLY different”

I just laugh, ”Maybe I will take your offer when there is a big event or party”

“Are you still… Kind of traumatized about two years ago?”

Two years ago, huh? It felt like yesterday. My dad has always been a huge loser, he never loved us at all. I swore all men off, I hate them…I wish I kept hating them two years ago. There was this cute guy who…Made me believe in men once again. He was kind, loving and everything I ever wished for. He treated me like a princess and made me feel whole… Until he left me like a trash.

I guess all men are trash

I know what you’re going to tell me now : Don’t judge the whole ocean just because of a drop of seawater or other sayings but I seriously don’t feel a thing anymore upon seeing the males of human race. I feel like they will hurt me eventually, I have to build my walls.

I have to…

“Hey”

I look up and meet the eyes of a young man with glasses. He’s wearing casual shirt and jeans with white coat,his hands tucked into the pockets.

“Ummm… One hot Americano and two sugar donuts, takeaway”

“Coming right up”

I stuff two donuts into a small box, “Need some extra sugar?”

“Ah no, thank you. My grandma can’t eat too much sugar”

Too much info, but I’m intrigued, “Grandma?”

“Yeah, I’m visiting her for a short while. She likes the donuts here, even though doctors told her not to”

I just laugh and hand him his orders,”That’d be ten dollars”

“Here you go”

“Thanks”

***

Since then, the man frequently visits our shop. Sometimes to buy donuts and other time just for coffee. There’s something enchanting when I see him sitting on the small table and chair at the shop’s corner , reading his book. At times, I wonder what he’s reading about

Seeing him has become a part of my life

And I love his voice when he talks to his grandma, so gently and full of love. Before long, I wonder how it feels to be loved by him. I think this is just how human brains are designed. We fall, we cry, we stand up…And fall again.

We seek for love, no matter how any times it breaks us down. We build walls but wait for that one person who will break the walls. We say we are fed up but we still wish for more. Ironically, you always have fallen to deep when you actually realize it.

Then one day, he comes to the counter.

“Donuts as usual?”

“That and one more thing”

“Berry donut? It’s our current best seller”

“May I have your number, Sheila?”,he said while staring at my name tag

I chuckle and smile

The air is still cold as ever and I hate crowds, but for once I don’t hate the people anymore. The scent of coffee flutters through the shop, I guess this year’s Christmas will be a bit warmer

Threads of Jades side story : Kai's Day Out

It was another peaceful morning in Yuan household

“So let me get this straight, you tried to make…Western food and this is the result?”,Feng shrugged looking at the unidentified black burnt substance on the big plate.

Yue stared at the floor, not saying a thing – clearly avoiding her husband’s eye contact

Silva was too tired after laughing like there was no tomorrow. “I-I taught her how to make French rollcake and she—“, he continued laughing until his tears came out

.

“STOP LAUGHING” Yue snapped

Silva laughed and escaped, leaving Feng and Yue staring at the black…food?

“Oh well-we will just go and eat outside. Father and mother aren’t in town anyway, what do you think?”

“Umm… Sure”

***

Ah Zhong walked around the house, he was bored. He wanted to join Feng and Yue but they told him to be a good boy and rest up at home since he hadn’t fully recovered. Maybe they want me gone because I’m a nuisance to their date, he thought to himself

He decided to search for something fun to do, like bothering Little Master Kai

Ah Zhong tiptoed to Kai’s room and slowly sled the door open, he peeked and saw Kai reading a book. He grinned and suddenly screamed, 

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

“GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”,Xiao Kai jumped from his seat.

Ah Zhong laughed hard, leaving Kai angry. “AH ZHONG,HOW DARE YOU!”

“S-sorry,sorry.”,he entered the room and sled the door back shut. The boy then sat beside Kai and poured him a cup of tea.”What are you reading, young master?”,Ah Zhong shifted topic.

“Compilation of paintings of girls”

“Wha…”

“For engagement, Father said”

Rich people are so strange, Ah Zhong inwardly mumbled, He is hardly a big kid yet and they are searching for is wife already. “Let me see”,Ah Zhong snatched the paintings from Kai’s hands.

“Heee,they are quite cute little girls..” Although some are older than Xiao Kai

“Father wants me to choose but how could I choose? I don’t know any of them”

“Hmmm…tell you what, Young Master. Let’s check these girls out”

“Huh?”

“Let’s sneak out”

Kai hesitated, afraid that he would get into trouble yet he was curious too. He pondered a bit and nodded,”Okay but make sure we will not get caught!”

“As you wish”

The two boys snuck out and happily wandered around town , buying snacks, watching street performers. “Young Master Kai,look at that”, Ah Zhong pointed at a family eating in a restaurant. Judging from their attires and bodyguards, it was quite an important family. Their youngest lady was gracefully munching her steamed bun.

“Boring”,Kai grumbled. “So gentle and princesslike,no fun”

Ah, so he likes cheerful energetic girls,Ah Zhong mentally noted

“That girl is one of the noble daughters in your list, Daughter of Xia family”

“Hee… I see”

Ah Zhong then led Xiao Kai to a lot of high-end places to see if they could catch glimpses of his fiancée candidates but none triggered Kai’s interest. They were mostly doing same thing, sewing, learning to arrange flowers  painting and all those things. I guess he is too young for women, Ah Zhong concluded. “I am starving”,Kai puffed his cheeks and grumbled. “Guan Inn is nearby,want to drop by? Your Sister-in-Law once mentioned her mother cooks the best mapo tofu in the world”

 “Hmmm…Sure,why not”

They walked to Guan Inn and was greeted by Hui Zhong the moment they entered the front gate.

“Why , hello Ah Zhong and Little Master Yuan”

“Umm…I want five meat steamed buns, dessert and a bowl of mapo tofu!”,Kai smiled

“Sure, but first let me lead you to your seats”

Wait, did he even bring so much money? Oh my, I didn’t expect him to order so much,AhZhong secretly panicked. “Young Master Kai… Do you…”,he whispered,”..bring enough gold?”

“Nah. I bring nothing!”

I AM DOOMED,Ah Zhong cussed. He couldn’t go back to take more as this sneaking away was supposedly a secret. WhatdoIdowhatdoIdo

Servants brought their orders (well, Kai’s) to table and Kai started eating happily. “YUMMYYY”,Kai smiled. Ah Zhong couldn’t help but laugh at Kai’s face when he was munching so happily. “Afoonghhh”, Kai spoke while eating,”Have you ever loved somebody?”

Ah Zhong was quiet, then he smiled weakly,”Nah, I have never really loved one girl or anything but there used to be some people that I loved with all my existence. I don’t even have clear memories of it anymore but I felt that way. It felt like I’ve lost something very important”

“Brother said you used to wander around woods without any memories nor friends, do you…Miss your family?”

“I don’t even remember anything before I became Ah Zhong so I’m not sure. But one thing, I felt warm in Yuan household. I feel right at home”

“Good!”

“Yes,good” Ah Zhong chuckled. But I wish I could remember , it feels like I lost some very important memories…

Ah Zhong was lost in thoughts when a little girl approached him. “Umm…”,she weakly muttered.

The girl was just adorable with her puffy reddish cheeks and fair skin. Her hair was tied to a pony tail and flower ornaments made her hair look so…Neat. “Mister… Are you in a trouble?”

“W-wha… No, Young Lady” Ah Zhong chuckled

“You looked…Sad”

“I am not”,he smiled

The girl then looked at Kai and smiled,”Hello! I am the daughter of next-door florist! Mom told me to spread happiness to everyone today. Therefore, I will give you each a free flower!”

The girl handed them each a pink flower and she smiled so happily.

“May happiness come to you!”

She then ran away happily, leaving Kai and Ah Zhong speechless. Happiness,huh?

Ah Zhong smiled, feeling warm deep inside. “Young master Ka—“

Kai was just sitting there staring at the direction the girl ran off, his jaw dropping and cheeks blushing. “Umm…”,Ah Zhong tried to interrupt Kai’s “trance” but he wouldn’t budge at all. Kai’s small hands were clutching the pink flower.

Ah Zhong just smiled,

Someone is having his first love

That day, Ah Zhong was lucky enough because Hui Zhong decided to treat Xiao Kai and he didn’t have to wash plates or anything to pay. But he felt free and lighter, and he felt optimistic that happiness will come someday.

Beside him was a blushing boy ,grinning

My oh my, Ah Zhong inwardly muttered

Finale of Our Parade

Wind blows, leaving a breezy feeling in me
My eyes stare at the clear blue sky
Fluffy white clouds
There are times when even things you see everyday
Seem so magnificent and grand
I hum as I flip the album with red cover
Different colors sate my eyes
Our smiles flashing
With my mind replaying each and every moments
With a smile drawn on my lips
Happiness may not last that long but
What we once had is beyond beautiful
Say,do you remember me?
Our parade has long been over
The jolly plays no longer scheduled
The butterflies we shared have perished
Alas, that is of nature - all gaiety must come to a finale
With our scripts burn to dusts
And we all regret nothing
Not a single fraction of things
As some things occur just to be recorded in our memories
As knowledge
Sweet fleeting memories or even scars
Life has never been perfect, but it has beautiful moments
Now take a bow as the curtain falls
As I gaze into your eyes and give you my best smile
"Gratitudes...",I mutter
"...and Farewell".

A Brother's Diary

It's another rare day off college and off-part time work.
I haven't had the luxury of having nothing to do for such long time...
The thing is,when you're always busy, you start treasuring any moments you can spend doing nothing at all like right now.
I hear the front door open and footsteps that sound like a titan's.
Must be my lil sis,she is in a foul mood.
Oh well, one...two....three
"BROTHER!",she slams my door open.

"Yeah yeah,what happened THIS time? Tell me"
She is still huffing and puffing, her hair messy as hell. Quite a funny sight actually.
"Sit down",I mutter as she sits down.
"So?"
"I am annoyed! He is ignoring me!"
"He who? The one or the other one?"
"BROTHER!"
"I am joking , chill!"

Let me sum this up.
My little sister's first love was an alien who rejected people with strange Albert Einstein theories (Even I as a man can't take his side because...Damn! What the hell? Theories? The only theory I remember is Charles Darwin's Evolution Theory). She was badly hurt and couldn't move past the heartbreak (Ah,youth...) for years. How did she get so devoted anyway? I've never even liked someone that long. Girls...

Anywayyyy,years later she found a good friend. Even I like him (not in a gay way,mind you!). He was a serious, smart and friendly guy. My only concern was that I can't really trust him. You know, man to man impressions... Man feeling. Call it whatever you want. Aaaanywayyyy this man is such a push & pull (door?), one day he's warm as cheesy gratin in Italian soup and other days he's colder than freezing point zero degree Celcius. One night he makes my sister feel like a madonna and the other day he ignores her like sidewalk pebbles. So she's causing a riot now because she's mad. She has been updating her BBM status saying things like Truth hurts but leaving someone hanging hurts that person more , IDGAF ANM... Who is she trying to fool, she cares.

This is the advice I've been giving her : Ignore him back , befriend someone else, marry someone else, but for now focus on making your brother happy like cooking gratin for him. Yeah,she smacked me hard when she heard that.

THE THING IS...
My sister tends to trust people very easily and treat everyone specially... So they all think she has crush for them. Treating everyone nicely is good but trusting ? Nope.If I must guess why this man runs away like a mouse chased by Garfield, I'd say he's afraid. Lil sis is too devoted style and committed and let's say she doesn't take things easily. He's afraid she will fall for him because he doesn't have any intentions to date nor any feels. He's young after all, I get it. If I tell her this though, I guarantee the response will be MEN ARE ALL JERKS. That's such an unfair statement!So it is better for him to ignore her and end things here before it turns to a drama consisting of 100 episodes.

I know it's selfish, but he's young-I was once young too. We are pretty much kids who want to be free. Psychologists said that women mature mentally faster than men and I can't agree more with those nerds. THEY MATURE TOO FAST.

"Maybe he just doesn't want to hurt you"
"I just want to be friends! Why so dramatic?"
"All relationships begin with friendship,dear"
"But still that ain't reasons to reject friendship. Am I hated?"
"I told you,you trust people too much and you're too nice,you come off as VERY DEVOTED"
"..."

Oh shit, I made her sad. Arrest me , sue me , judge me guilty, give me death penalty.
"I don't even love him. I just want to be friends. He doesn't need to ignore me"
"Let's just make it a lesson kay?"
"It can't be a lesson if he won't tell me where I went wrong, why we can't be friends, what wrong impression or misunderstanding I gave him!"

...Good point there...

"If he suddenly ignores me without a fight, I don't know what to make of it..."
She slumps
Poor sister, she's so sad.

"They say everything happens for a reason",I start speaking,"Of course we don't know what reasons but there are countless possibilities. What if God is putting up a magic barrier between you because He foresees tragedies ahead? Maybe you two end up dating and parents don't agree like those old Chinese dramas? Maybe he's secretly a psycho or he is a playboy? Maybe your fated one is somewhere else? Maybe if you become friends someday you will be partners in committing Terror and Bombing Bali?Who knows. But picture this. If pizza makers didn't put any vegetables on pizza because they are hated by children,we won't get to taste the freshness in pizza tomatoes ever. If Cinderella chose to be a good girl and stayed home, she wouldn't meet Prince Charming. And if you choose to proceed with him , maybe you will miss a chance of becoming a mafia wife or queen"

Makes no sense, I know. But I do believe so.
And I swear I will never treat a woman like that because I'm afraid of karma. I have a sister.

After moments of silence,my little sister laugh hard. I just...shrug, at least she's laughing right? "You're right brother. Why make this such a fuss? I still have many friends anyway. And sometimes... Strange things happen and we will never find out why but God knows. Someday, we will both be drinking wine and laughing about the past"
"Yes,save your kindness and devotion for your starving brother and future boyfriendssss"
"Boyfriend"
"Okay,omit plural. Now let's order a pizza with extra cheese". GRAMMAR NAZI!

Whatever it is, I will watch over her till she grows to be a good woman. And someday, in her big house when she's having a birthday party of her first child and lots of her friends are around , I will pat her shoulder and say

"I told you"

Regrets and Chances

00:00

His PoV

I guess it really is over. I’m just here, slowly being swallowed in the darkness with only streetlights illuminating my heart. Inside my car, now it’s only mine and no longer ours. “Metallic black horse”-the silly name you gave to this sport car. I chuckle as your face appears in my mind, that fair and smooth face… I miss pinching your cheeks. I wish I could get off this car now and enter our home, then I will hug your fragile back once again . However, it is not even our home any longer. It hurts, I suffocate thinking about it. Here I am, outside of a place we once called our little sanctuary-our simple home, yet too cowardly to even step out of this car.

That window on the second floor is dark, are you asleep? I can’t even close my eyes at night. When I do, your voice lingers and I can smell the scent of your shampoo. I used to say your hair smells like a kid’s because  of the orange-scented shampoo but now I’d do anything just to have you beside me. Anything. I scroll through your Instagram timeline and I don’t find our pictures anymore. I feel like a loser, stalking all your social medias. Get a life ,my friends said to me. It is all my own fault, I wasted you.

I wanted to have a taste of forbidden fruit, now I can’t turn back. Hah, look at me sounding like Shakespeare. I can’t survive a day without staring at a picture where you look so…charming. I remember well, I took it. It is probably the only me-related post left in your accounts. Your face has always been so natural, without any trace of colour brushes yet you look flawless. You don’t dye your hair or curl but I think black suits you the most. I love your cute T-shirts with silly prints, girls like you are hard to find.

So why was I such an idiot? I stupidly got attracted by those women in heels, golden purses, with hot smoky faces. I was smitten by one of them with her seductive words, enjoying the feel of sharp red claws on my back. The taste of liquor from her lips that made me drunk and all was just… Spinning around. I felt like a cool man, walking alongside such gorgeous lady with her tight red mini dress. I was a fool, I was even more foolish than a foolish fool. I let you down.

Her PoV

I know you’re parking in front of our— I guess now it is yours yet I shamelessly made you get out. I’m not asleep, as if I can sleep. For nights , I just want to curl into a ball and scream as loud as I can ‘till my heart is empty but I can’t. I scream deep inside demanding God or whoever created fate to just take me away. Half of my soul was stripped away and now I feel bare and fragile. He was everything I wanted, all I have, all I trust and now I barely know him. How could I stay calm when I saw clear red lip print on his neck? Tell me, how? He was drunk, and he immediately fell asleep . I couldn’t even cry as I packed his stuff all to big boxes and shipped them away to his eldest brother’s house. I was a bastard, I know this house is legally ours but he paid for it so it is actually his. I guess my brain could barely work that time. The next day, I left home early leaving a note for you. I never thought you’d actually get out of the house though.

I know that each and every nights, you park outside till the sun comes up then leaves. I hope you’d stop, stop sending those apology texts or try calling or sending me emails. Stopstopstop!!! Just…Stop. Where did my baby go? Who was that man who started being distant, no longer hugs or ruffles through my hair? Who was that man who came home so late and ignored my texts? Who? Give me back my man! Give him back!!!!,and I keep I screaming inside –all while being wrapped under my blanket. I want your lingering husky voice to stop calling me, I want to forget the warmth of your big hands. Leave me alone!

08:00

His PoV

Her forgiveness is something I can never get. That morning I found a note, “Get Out, Stranger”. I knew she saw me… She saw the texts in my phone. It’s over. I walked around the house, looking at our pictures. She has always been so naturally cute-her kind heart was one-in-a-million and I knew I wanted her since the beginning. Curiosity does kill, what was I thinking “trying out” the girl out there who only cared about salon and clothes and seducing me just so I buy her those Prada handbags? Why did I waste my girl, the one who stayed up late texting me back then and accompanying me watch World Cup while snacking ? Sure she isn’t slim and sexy like models, but as a man I like her curvy cute fleshy body. Now I sound like a psycho hahahahhh.

I loved her and still do-her cute sandwiches, her never-ending book shopping list, her obsession in collecting kids meal toys… Everything. I was stupid , please smile to me once more… Call my name once again. It’s totally my fault and I owe you happiness. I cut her off, the woman in heels but still she ain’t coming back. Now I’m a loser, laying around at my eldest brother’s home and not working. What am I doing with my life?

I text her again,

“I can’t sleep, I miss you. I’m sorry, I was a fool…Please give me a second chance… I love you so….”

Her PoV

I love you too…The you before. Your brother called me, saying I should at least talk to you once again but what is there to say? I’m not enough for you. Not slim enough , not pretty enough and I guess not good in satisfying you. But I tried! I searched up recipes for good lunchboxes, tried to dress up a bit but heels and tight dresses just don’t suit my big body! I guess love alone is never enough.

Your voice…It keeps lingering no matter how much I tell it to stop ringing in my head. Chance? I want to give you one but…I can’t trust you anymore. You think having texts unreplied is simple but for us girls? IT FUCKING HURTS WHEN YOU READ BUT NEVER REPLY. It hurts when your usual “What’s up? ^^ Wait okk,I’m driving at the moment hehe” turns to “Yes?” “I’m driving”. It hurts when you grow distant and don’t even hug me anymore. Now I’m crying hard, screaming after keeping it in for days. I…will just call Ann saying I’m sick and can’t make it to work. I can’t go, not in this state. I know he has been stalking me to my workplaces too. Stop it…Please…

Stop ringing in my head…Stop…

15:00

His PoV

She isn’t in today, why is she skipping work? I sip my cup of coffee while walking in a shopping department we used to visit a lot. Foolish, but I wish I could see her here even just from afar. A song rings in my head, a song I just heard from the radio

“Answer me, say it now

Say it now, your lingering voice

It’s too late but slowly, say it now

Only after it was over, I’m standing here, can’t believe it… Baby I’m so sorry”

It was by a Korean guy named Max of TVXQ ,titled Apology, but it really broke me into tears. Apology, apology…I was a jerk and you should forget me but I’m afraid of your forgetting me. I want to leave traces I exist, “we” existed. I want to hammer my every inch to your mind. I want to kiss my baby, my dearest one. Why is she skipping work today? I hope she ain’t sick.

Her PoV

I’m tired… I know he has cut off contact with that woman and he really means it. It’s me who can no longer trust. It hurts too much, boy… and I need a short trip somewhere or I will go mad

21:00

His PoV

Why isn’t she home? The door is shut tight too. I’ve been afraid of using my keys but tonight I’m getting in. It’s dark… Where is she? I get into the house and search… One of our bags is missing along with some of clothes and belongings.

She left her ring

Our rings… I cry out as I slam my fists to the door. Is everything too late? Have I lost my baby? I can’t…I’m gonna keep looking until I find her. She can slap me , kill me anything… I just want to see her. I realize I don’t need a Paris Hilton as my girlfriend-I need her, the one who loves me not just to my moon and back but all my sky along with storms and thunders. I’m going insane!

It hurts deeper and deeper, now I know without you I’m a soulless flesh… Void being without any reasons to live. I miss you… I’m sorry..

A week passed…

20:00

Her PoV

As I thought, a short getaway to countryside is calming. The air and stuff, the friendly people… AND GOOD FOOD! I feel better. I’ve switched off my phone for a week but I guess time to face my life. With trembling hands, I switch my phone on. As I thought miscalls and texts from him overflow. I wonder when he will get tired of this. I read a text from his brother,

 “I know he’s wrong, he’s at fault but he truly realizes his errors now… Please forgive him. I can’t stand seeing him like this. He drives everywhere to find you, cries and screams at night and he takes antidepressant pills nowadays.

He loves you.

Please…”

My eyes tear up, my baby is one of the strongest men out there. Even when he’s really sad, he doesn’t cry. What…What am I to do? I want to scream to now, until my life fades away… It hurts, like a blade piercing through my heart. Memories of us flash back-the trip to Japan together, our midnight dates, our lazy Sunday watching TV at home, our…everything. God tell me, what do I do now?

His PoV

I’m wrecked… I’m just wrecked. Where is she? My body could hardly handle any more sleepless nights but I can’t stand dreaming about you and waking up knowing it is a mere illusion. A dream is a wish your heart makes, Cinderella said. True. I know apologies alone can’t make it, I tried proving with real acts still you won’t come back.

Girl, I love you so… Call my name, just once more

Hold my hand once more as you drag me to the nearest bookstore

Complain about my eating habit once more

All those annoying little things I hate about you… Now I’d die just to have them back . I’m begging you, come back… And that’s the last thing in my mind before everything blacks out.

I’m… Sorry 

23:00

Her PoV

Nononono… Please be alright. I tremble, hugging my own body. Don’t go like this… I love you despite my screams. I will never forgive you if you die. I keep replaying the conversation with that nurse, “We found your picture and phone number in the patient’s wallet” Nononono “…in critical condition” Nonono stop…Stop… “hit by a huge tree trunk when lightning struck…” God,don’t punish him yet.. Don’t take him away from me. I’m crying hard now as I run to the hospital

I’m so sorry

I could have at least listened to you… Baby, I miss you

 *   *  *

His PoV

I am not…dead yet huh? Shit, my head hurts. I sit and try to pull the damn needle out of my vein. “What do you think you’re doing?!’,my brother yelled.

“I’m…gonna search for her”

“Wha…”

“Next I’m going out of town”

“You’re mad!”

“…I am, mad about her. I love that girl…”

“Stop doing this to yourself!”

My eldest brother slaps me hard but I no longer feel a thing.

I stand up and walk to the door, my brother just freezes in a loss of words. Then I see her. In front of me, her face a mess with tears. Am I…dreaming? Am I actually dead? She runs to me and embraces me hard while crying hard.

Her scent…Warmth…

I…am home.

I sob as I hug her back. “I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I’m sorry…. I love you…I really do…I…I….”

Her voice was muffled in tears but I hear her,

“I…love you too”

And I’m home, to your warm embrace. And now I know what I truly want in life. I don’t need a perfect partner, I want you who’s perfect in my life…

Safely back in your arms...

I Love You 






song : Max (TVXQ)-Apology from album Rise as Gods